Let’s segregate sexual violence from the sexuality spectrum

One of the common responses to the Kenny Klein scandal is “let’s talk about sexual ethics.” On the surface, that’s the logical leap.

But under the surface, it’s wrong.
It inadvertently implies that somewhere, in a teeny tiny corner of spectrums and scales, there might – just might – be acceptable room for a pedophile, or rape, or non-consent.

Why?

Because we’re classifying the violence with sex. We’re acting like sex has any degree of violence to it, as though in its most natural form it’s a violent act.

That’s the rape culture in all of us, somehow making it a sex thing when it’s not.

Pedophilia and absolutely every other kind of rape and molestation are not sex. We need to stop talking about them as though they are part of a “sexual spectrum.” This normalizes the behavior and thus subvertly endorses it. It does not matter whether or not the perp is aroused when acting – the high comes from the violence, not from the biological mechanics.

These acts are violence that USES sex as the weapon of choice.

There should never be ANY room for discussions of sexuality revolving around rape or pedophilia because they are not a matter of sexuality – they are a matter of criminal pathology. To allow for any grey area at all is to leach poison into our already poisoned collective sexual consciousness.

Someone will say “but BDSM …” BDSM is an artistic interaction and is not sexual violence. It’s sex. It is consent to the point of artistry. Once the rules of a BDSM contract are broken, it’s rape. Again, there is no room for grey.

Note: I am hoping that the post titles alone are enough of a trigger warning.